Windows, Souls, Eyes Oh My

Surely if the eyes are the window to the soul then mine must be black as sin. 

Surely with the hurt and loss, abuse and torture I have suffered I must be broken down and shattered within. 

Surely with all I’ve seen all I have done and all I have destroyed, it is far too late for me to be saved. 

Surely I am a lone wandering excuse for a human shell. Left to rot. Surely….Surely it must be so. 

Who says? Who says I cannot find hope and strength within? Who says I cannot stand upon my own two feet, raise my face to the sun and move past the darkness and into the light?

You say. 

You say because you are afraid of what I will become. You push me down when I stand tall. You watch me beg watch me fall, laughing at my misdeeds, jesting upon my courage. I will, I shall I can stand tall. I will be free. I will seek light. I will find my path…….

Not today, perhaps tomorrow….or another day, another week, another month…this sounds about right. 

Waiting is best, fear lingers here, her power and scent strong, holding me back….Fear is good. Fear is comforting…I will not stand tall, I will not shall not cannot stand tall. I shall never be free, for within the darkness I know my place. I am filled with quiet grace. I am strong, secretly so….I’ll have my day…..maybe. 

 

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